This is a photo of me, my sister Ruth and brother David, taken by our dad sometime back in the mid-1960’s as part of our annual family photo shoot series. A pain at the time (Do we have to do this again???) but a priceless treasure now.
As I look at our fresh young faces, it’s hard for me to believe that within the next few weeks, both of my siblings will be retiring – while I continue to write about retirement.
Holy moly, where did the time go?
Of course “retirement” no longer means what it once did. In fact, I’m betting that as soon as David reads this, he’ll send me a note reminding me that he is NOT “retiring.” Semantics aside, David is leaving his long-term career behind to enjoy an extended period of travel, after which he’ll decide what’s next. A consulting, speaking, writing or service gig(s) could all be in his future.
Ruth, who is the older sibling, is more comfortable referring to her transition as retirement. But she too will likely pursue some consulting and volunteer work down the road. For now, she intends on taking a well-deserved “rest” (if you know Ruth, you’ll understand why I put rest in quotes) and then she’ll spend the summer helping to watch her grandchildren.
It’s going to be fun to see what’s next for each of them. They are both so incredibly talented and smart that whatever they do is sure to be a success. (And as they like to remind me, if they falter while planning their second acts, they know where to turn for some free advice.)
As for me, watching them navigate this transition has proven quite enlightening. It’s given me a far greater appreciation of the fact that even when you’ve got everything going for you heading into retirement – good health, financial resources and marketable skills – the letting go process is still a challenge.
Needless to say, I realized this before – at least on an intellectual level. Change is never easy. But now, thanks to my siblings, I have a better understanding of the many emotional swings that mark this transition.
In one of my favorite books, Transitions, William Bridges writes, “Why is letting go so difficult? This is a puzzling question, especially if we have been looking forward to a change. It is frightening to discover that some part of us is still holding on to what we used to be, for it makes us wonder whether the change was a bad idea. Can it be that the old thing was somehow (and in spite of everything we thought we knew) right for us and the new thing wrong?”
I trust that as my siblings settle into their new lives, they will discover that what lies ahead will be very right for them, albeit in a different form than their old lives. Our mother was a wonderful role model of how to live a productive second act, working as a part-time reporter and active community volunteer until age 84, and I know they will build on her example.
Until then, I hope they enjoy their well deserved send-offs and take pride in all of their amazing career accomplishments. I for one couldn’t be more proud.
Congratulations Ruth and David. Here’s to new beginnings, wherever they lead. And now, let the celebrations begin!
